Notes on life, philosophy, and medicine

Over the last several weeks, I've been posting material I wrote in the months preceding, rather than put typed letters directly onto this old blog. So here I am, in all my glory and not, at 4:12am after fussing around, exploring the dark of night in my home and my withering mind.  Withered from hustle of days, lost in unconscious meanderings, un-fully appreciated in the present. The bright glare of the computer screen stares back against the blackness of this small room, hoping for magic. Magic to transform days passing to days living. To give this little life, ALL.  Take me as I am, embrace all my imperfections, because I want to shine.  ... 

Bora bora: At the first sight of sun light over mountaintops, what was once dark reveals the most ethereal blue hues and the signs of depth shines just below the surface which is not hidden if one cares to look. Within your body lies another world full of treasures and colors unbeknownst to just the passerby yet it was not meant for that, but rather to be uncovered and even explored. Your body is a reflection of all bodies. If we can listen, preserve then we can learn, cherish.

The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it” CS Lewis I found this incredible missing link to the work I do as a physician, a wannabe healer of my patients, and that is the work of understanding trauma, of how trauma can trap someone from the experience of life anew.  Even without trauma, a question of how to mindfully and presently live our lives is still a powerful and challenging one.  Top that off with the mind numbing,  haunted by automations of the brain, that entraps us to relive our worse moments and to be stalled by fright, how does one live presently?  The first part of that answer may be to accept our emotions - to  feel them and to label them - so that we can tell our story, grounding us enough to give us back our wings.